Trick Tracts

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Trick Tracts Parodies: What Happens

From the Chick website: What DOES happen to those tracts? Sometimes we do not see the results immediately. But as these testimonies show, the Chick tracts you hand out are getting read, and changing lives!

Also, I think it goes without saying that these are not actual letters, but, rather, a tongue-in-cheek example of what this author thinks of the mindsets of people who read these things might be.

From Trick Tracts: The letters you don't see on the site!

Everywhere I go, I see your tracts! I feel they are like the plague. Please stop.
- New York

After reading one of your tracts, I left the church, stopped giving to charities, no longer volunteer at the battered woman's shelter, and stopped that ridiculous Santa Claus business where I donated toys to homeless children every Christmas. All of these things were part of my church - and you've taught me that church is wrong - even when it's doing right. Thanks for saving my soul (and a lot of free time).
- Email

I am 10. Your tracts scared me. Why does Jesus want me to burn in hell? Why doesn't God love me?
- Maine

Your tracts are a nuisance. Ever since displaying an artistic rendition of the nativity in my yard at Christmas people are littering my lawn with your tracts! Do you promote littering? Does God like you scattering paper all over the place and does he encourage you to drown people in your booklets? I think you people are crazy.
- Email

Your tracts saved my life! I was about to marry the man of my dreams - he loved me, supported me and my two children, and worked hard to make our lives better. But after being saved by your tracts, my fiancee would not give up his Catholic religion to be saved by the truth of Christ. I left him. Though I'm back working two jobs and my kids are doing without a lot of the time, I feel better knowing I will have my place in heaven.
- Ohio

Please stop.
- Email

With all the tracts co-workers left on my desk after announcing to my office that I was a homosexual Witch, I was able to have the perfect Beltane bonfire with my coven! Many thanks.
- Email

I hand out your tracts to homeless people on the street. I know that giving them God's word is more important and better for them than any money or extra food I could spare.
- Illinois

I was a Mason and a Catholic. After reading your tracts, I knew I had to dispel, not only the evil I had brought to myself and my home, but the evil that was still around my unsuspecting friends and family. I took your advice in "The Curse of Baphomet" and burned my Mason robes and relics. I decided to then burn down the lodge and my church to save my loved ones from this evil. Though I now serve a 10 year Arson sentence in prison, I know I have done right by the Lord and my salvation is recognized.
- Georgia

Why do you lie to people? It's not cool.
- Email

Thanks for the laugh. Your comics are a hoot - my friends and I pull them out every now and again just for fun.
- Email

When I realized my husband brought evil into our home by being a Mason, I divorced him. When I found my daughter reading Harry Potter books after I'd told her not to, I kicked her out even though she is only twelve. When my 18-year old son told me he was gay, I shunned him from my life. When my friends continued to practice Halloween with their families, I stopped speaking to them. When my mother insisted her good works and pious life assured her place in heaven, I pray for her lost soul every night - and send her Trick Tracts in the mail every week. All though I have lost everyone I loved, and do not leave the house much anymore - I am joyous that I have a relationship with the Savior - he is the only family and friend that I need. Thank you Trick Tracts for showing me the light.
- N. Dakota

Every night when my college friends go out drinking and partying, I go with them. But when they go into the bars, I stay behind in the parking lot witnessing for Christ. I hand out Trick Tracts to people going into the bars and try to save as many as I can. When my friends come out, I drive them home. Actually, they are not my friends. I think they bring me because I am the only sober person to drive them home - they laugh at my Tracts. It does not matter because I spend every weekend night out at the bars in my city, witnessing for Christ. I love my weekends. I laugh inside because I know I am saved, and that none of them are having as good a time as I.
- Email

My brother died using your tracts to save others. I feel venerated knowing he is saved and safe in heaven. He felt it his duty to try and preach the Word to a cannibal tribe in Africa. They do not take well to strangers, and do not speak or read English. My brother felt it was tragic that this African tribe would never have a chance to be saved - would never have a chance to hear the Truth - and would burn in hell by no fault of their own. However, my brother's noble plans were for naught. The tribesmen cooked and ate him. I am glad my brother tried to do the right thing and I hope he saved at least one of them before they ate him - so that he would go to heaven. Amen.
- Nebraska

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