Trick Tracts Review: "The Accident"

Synopsis: A stain on Lord Winthorp's priceless, white tiger fur carpet makes him aware of the stain on his soul that will prevent his entry into heaven.

No, I didn't make that up.

There's no point in really going into the storyline here because it's doesn't get much deeper (or make much more sense) than the synopsis you just read. There are, however, a few tidbits that deserve some note.

Lord Winthorp queries his doctor (yes, his doctor) as to how he can cleanse his soul and be accepted into heaven:

"Should I become religious and do good works?" asks a worried Lord Winthorp. (Sounds good to me)

"No..." his oddly-biblically-scholared-doctor answers. Dr. Preacher tells Winthorp that when Adam and Eve sinned against God and tainted their own souls they also tainted everyone who's ever lived or will ever live along with them so that we ALL deserve hell. Don't you just hate it when the bad apples ruin it for everyone? I don't know about the rest of the world, but I sure have a problem with being blamed for something that two people who lived centuries ago did.

The tract then goes on to say: "To get sins forgiven, God has always required that innocent blood be shed." Yes, it causes shivers up my spine as well. I also learned that "since the blood of all mankind is stained with sin, it is worthless." Damn this worthless blood - I was always under the mistaken impression that it kept me alive. Who knew?

There isn't much else to say. Jack Chick's usual smashing good job of stereotyping is on full display here, as the proper Englishmen live in a castle, dress in Old World suits, and even possess a butler and a kitchen maid.

Let's close this by reminding the less intelligent of our brethren that not all Englishmen live in castles or wear top hats and that your blood isn't worthless (really, try living without a few pints of it). Personally, if their version of God wants to hate you for something centuries-dead folk did that ticked him off, they might really want to rework that whole "God is Love" thing.

Read the actual Chick Tract: The Accident

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