Who Gives a Fuck, Right?

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This page last updated on 5 October, 2006

Return to Success Sux!

I bash sucky celebs everyday:

Think most stars today suck? So do we.

Star Suck

Fan Suck

 

 

 

 

People always ask dumb questions about these pages, so I decided to give them a few dumb answers:

1) Why do you "waste" so much time bashing on other people?

In one form or another, people are always asking me why I spend so much time creating a page on someone I hate. Why "waste" my time bashing an innocent person and just what kind of a monster am I?

First things first, it doesn't take a massive amount of my free time to create the Sux pages; in fact, it takes very little. There's tons of information online and otherwise chronicling these individuals' shortcomings and one only has to be slightly aware of the entertainment industry to know the buzz. I also rarely - if ever - update the pages; and it's usually a design update before it's anything else.

The design's a no-brainer; I originally designed the Ashlee Simpson Sux page in under an hour and now just alter that original design as needed when I decide to take on new suckers. Doing the write-ups takes even less time than that.

So before you accuse me of wasting hours and days of my life taking down today's stars, know that the opposite is true. If this took hours and days, I wouldn't even bother.

As for Star Suck and Fan Suck - again, this doesn't involve a huge chunk of my life. I write posts in the morning, usually, and then I'm done.

2) Well, ok then you must just be a total bitch, right?

So you're wondering what kind of a person would spend any amount of time verbally condemning another? And furthermore, why?

I feel this can be cleared up by re-posting a response I made on a message board to this very question:

You can say "change the channel/station/etc." if you don't like what you're hearing, but as we've stated, the problem here is the media and these generic "stars" in general. The media is shoveling crap down our throats and unless we stand up and voice our distaste for it, they will keep doing it. If we let them know we won't stand for this kind of bilge, perhaps they'll start investing their time and money in searching out *real* talent, rather than trying to create it out of thin air. In the end it is our money that keeps them in business and, therefore, it is our duty to inform them that we're sick of wasting our money on their trash. We deserve better - we want better - and we will be heard.

The fact of the matter is, most people are fed up with all these pop-clone and crossover "artists" who aren't really that talented to begin with. That's where the "hate" comes in.

I do not hate Ashlee Simpson, Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, Hilary Duff and Aaron Carter in a malicious way. I do not want them dead - I do not wish actual ill-will upon them. Did you ever stop to think that it might be possible to dislike someone for their actions and what they stand for and not hate them directly?

Let's not forget, too, that celebrities put themselves in the spotlight; for better or for worse. Not everyone is going to like them and some people are going to bash them more than others; it's a fact of life and has been since the idea of "celebrity" first began. They know this when they choose these careers, so I really don't feel sorry for them in this respect. You cannot put yourself out to the entire world and expect the entire world to embrace, love and respect you.

2) Why are you so jealous of [insert-name-of-sucky-star-here]? (Usually written as 'u r jus jelos - u suk').'

Trust me, jealousy is so far off the mark you couldn't even begin to imagine. Since when does having no respect for a person mean you are jealous of them? I just can't seem to make the connection.

I am not jealous of these fake people. I would rather never be famous than be famous only because I happened to have hired a good marketing team. These people are untalented and could give a toss about the "art" of the careers they are pursuing. They are a mockery to the truly talented out there who never get a break because the media giants spend all of their time creating "something" out of nothing. Can we say "Ashlee Simpson"? Had this girl not had a halfway famous sister, and a freaky, pushy father, she never - never in a million years - would've gotten a record contract. Why? Because she sucks - completely and totally.

Sure, I'm jealous of people that make fools of themselves every day pretending to be something they're not. I mean, seriously, come on.

Honestly, if you can't come up with a better retort to defend your precious stars' honor - then get the fuck off of my website.

3) Why do you make fun of people's grammar and writing skills - it's just chat-slang and not everyone is a wordsmith like you?

Because I think there is nothing funnier than some dumbass trying to make a statement and sounding like a 4 year-old dyslexic from a third-world country.

If you "love" these stars - as many of you freaks claim to do - then it would seem you would at least try to use a little decorum and intelligence when defending them. If I were taking a stand on an issue that I cared deeply about, or defending something I felt passionately about, I would attempt to come across as someone whose opinion actually matters; someone that people might listen to. When your only retort is something along the lines of 'u mus want to suk her tits' no one is going to take you seriously. In fact, we're going to laugh at you.

Obvious grammar mistakes and typoes are not generally what I go after. Everyone makes honest mistakes - including me on these pages! But when someone writes something along the lines of:

like hil dugg rox she iz da bombizzle i luv her but alas i do not kno her os i will never kno her but she is still da bomb and if u duznt like her u will pay.

...I'm going to say something. There is having an okay grasp of the English language and making a few mistakes, and then there is coming off as being completely and hopelessly illiterate. This goes beyond being young and/or using chat slang. This is atrocious.

If you are going to defend the honor of your one, true love obsession, then at least care enough to make a point in their defense that is literate and well thought out. Otherwise, you might as well not waste your time or my guestbook space.

4) At least [insert-name-of-sucky-star] is trying to follow their dream. Why can't you just leave them alone?

Well, in all reality, I am leaving them alone.

I'm not sending my sucky pages to their homes, now am I? I'm not actively emailing or calling them with bitchy gripes. I'm doing nothing more than stating my opinion on my own webpage that I designed with web space that I pay for.

Which, last I checked in this country, I'm completely allowed to do.

5) How could you say those lies about [insert-name-of-sucky-star]?

I fail to see how I'm lying when everything I state on these pages is either:

  1. Proven fact:
    • Paris stole a video tape.
    • Hilary said to Rolling Stone magazine that she didn't want to help write her fist album.
    • Ashlee Simpson got busted lip-syncing on Saturday Night Live.
  2. Only my opinion:
    • Lindsay looks horrible as a blonde.
    • Paris is fugly and unsexy.
    • Ashlee's lyrics are completely ridiculous.

Just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's an untruth. The truth hurts and my opinions are just that - my opinions. I'm entitled to them, and you don't have to like them or agree with them. In fact, I don't give two rats' asses if you do.

Why are you wasting my time with stupid questions?

You should also take a moment and read the Star Suck & Fan Suck FAQ:

People always come here asking stupid questions and making even more stupid assumptions. Hopefully this F.A.Q. will clear up some of their confusion - which is doubtful considering they won't take the time to read it and probably wouldn't understand it if they did. But, at least I can say I tried.

1) Why do you "waste" so much time bashing on other people?

I love this question; I always want to respond with, "Why are you wasting so much time commenting on a site you obviously don't like?" I don't have to, though, because I know the answer: it's probably because you felt like expressing your opinion - *slaps forehead* - well, surprise, I do it for the same damn reason. The logic is dazzling, I know.

I have things to say; I'm opinionated like that. So I took the time to purchase a domain, buy some web space and update the site more-or-less frequently with said opinions. It's all pretty simple.

I don't get "worked up" or "bent out of shape" about these moronic stars or their insipid actions; in fact, I love this shit - I'm laughing my ass off at them 99% of the time while I'm writing. The only people getting their panties in a wad on this site are the rabid, illiterate fans.

I do this because I enjoy it and because I can; it doesn't go any deeper than that.

2) Why do you go off on people who defend their favorite celebrities in comments & email?

Ah, you, like the majority of folks that come here, have neglected to read my disclaimer before coming in and jumping all over me. Let me share with you the most important part:

I have a right to my viewpoints, as mean-spirited and unvarnished as they might be, and a right to share them on my own personal web space. You do not have to agree with them - you don’t even have to read them.

If my personal opinions bother you that deeply, however, you also have a right to share your viewpoints - you can email those thoughts to me, or leave your comments.

You are welcome to bash me and my opinions, but be forewarned that I will knock you back twice as hard. This is my space on the web; if you don’t like it, start your own page. What can I say? Life isn’t fair.

The thing about it is this, I have no problems having a mature dissertation on opposing viewpoints in a reasonable manner. In fact, I have done so; I actually enjoy discussing issues with someone who has conflicting opinions.

That said, I will not stand idly by while some ignorant piece of shit attacks me for my opinions with their illiterate, sophomoric drivel. You can disagree with me; you have that right and I respect it. You do not have the right, however, to attempt to insult me because my opinions differ from yours - especially not on my web space.

If you don't like what I have to say, hit the Close [X] button on your browser and never return; it makes no difference to me. If you want to discuss our contrary views and you can conduct yourself like a sophisticated, literate human being, I'm willing to hear you. If you go off on me just because you don't like what I have to say, prepare to be bashed and likely - if you're dumb enough - to end up on Fan Suck; which is a special place reserved for people like you.

That clear enough for you? Good. Now let's all place nice.

4) Why do you make fun of people's grammar and writing skills - it's just chat-slang and not everyone is a wordsmith like you?

This one is answered above.

5) You're just jealous, fat, ugly, unsuccessful, stupid, and/or have a miserable life!

Well, not exactly. I'm not overweight, I'm not ugly, and I'm about as far from "stupid" as one might hope to get.

I actually happen to be quite successful, thank you, working a full-time job, as well as owning my own small sideline business and doing freelance writing in my spare time.

My life is anything but "miserable"; I have a beautiful home, a cool car that I love, the most amazing, precious two cats in the world, and probably the sweetest, cutest, sexiest and most perfect man a woman could ask for to call my own.

I also have a wonderful relationship with my parents and siblings, and have been blessed with an awesome family and the most fun and endearing friends anyone could ever hope to have.

If this is misery, I must admit, I'm loving it.

As to the jealousy issue: Trust me, jealousy is so far off the mark you couldn't even begin to imagine. Since when does having no respect for a person mean you are jealous of them? I just can't seem to make the connection.

I am not jealous of these fake people. I would rather never be famous than be famous only because I happened to have hired a good marketing team. These people are untalented and could give a toss about the "art" of the careers they are pursuing. They are a mockery to the truly talented out there who never get a break because the media giants spend all of their time creating "something" out of nothing. Can we say "Ashlee Simpson"? Had this girl not had a halfway famous sister, and a freaky, pushy father, she never - never in a million years - would've gotten a record contract. Why? Because she sucks - completely and totally.

I am in no way jealous of people that make fools of themselves every day pretending to be something they're not.